= a (romantic?) dinner alone.
and, Hi!, I organize my DVDs from serious to silly
Oh by the way, everyone should eat a whole carrot with its tops on at least once in their lifetime...it feels very much like you're standing for a cause.
So back to my DVDs. I don't have quite enough to organize in alphabetical order or by genre. I've considered lining them up in a color order/spectrum. But the reason I have my movies in this order is actually not as surface level as it may seem. From most serious (Alias, March of the Penguins, Fireside Reflections) to most silly (Mary Poppins, Enchanted, Good Burger-not mine, my roommates'), there is something for every mood.
And since I struggle with over-empathizing, I must be very careful about what I let into my head...especially during down time. You may not make the connection. Well, my strength (yay! I can call it a strength! That's progress, people) of empathy can sometimes prove to be a burden. I have the ability to (almost) fully immerse myself into someone's woes and words and then...to stay there. To try and find a solution for them (us). To worry.
And I know worrying does no good to anyone involved. It's a Biblical mandate NOT to worry, actually (talk about pressure)! With this realization, which has come over the past few months, came another: movies totally affect my emotions. When I say totally, I mean
wholly; entirely; completely.
I was watching too many sad movies! I was gaining too much emotional catharsis from fake people. (Ouch. That was hard to say.) But now I know that there are days when I can not handle a movie where someone dies. That's why I have Stepmom, Finding Neverland, and My Girl all grouped together. In fact, I haven't watched dying people movies in a long time. Maybe I'm afraid I'll revert to my old habits. I'm afraid that I'll sit on that green couch crying over something sad and not feeling like I can move on from it.
The truth is: I'm growing. I don't think that will be me tonight. In fact, I plan on watching an "unsafe" movie this evening (ooo, sounds scandalous...but you know what I mean). Praise the Lord for his help in lassoing my dangerous strength of empathy into something productive and sweet again. It's a process, of course, and right now I'm happy to be where I am.
(I really hope you were able to read this the way I said it in my mind. It had really good tone, if I may say so)
(Oh yeah, "Fireside Reflections" is a $1 DVD from Target that plays a fireplace...by the way.)