Monday, July 11, 2011

Change of Plans

When I was six years old, I really wanted a My Size Barbie for Christmas. Anyone remember those? I don't exactly know what the draw was... a portable friend, I guess. Age six was also the last year I believed in Santa Clause (for such an imaginative kid, I was really practical when it came to Santa). You see, I asked Santa over and over for the My Size Barbie as Christmas fast-approached. To no avail. My mom even said so delicately one day, "Honey, Santa can't afford a My Size Barbie this year", to which I naturally responded, "But he's buying one for Allison!" I, instead, got a Little Tike's "my size" desk that worked out beautifully. Change of plans.

By age eleven, I was no longer concerned with Barbies, but was rather more concerned with beginning my journey to self discovery. I wanted to get back into dance classes, as I hadn't done ballet for a few years. My mom and dad were always eager for me to get involved in group activities ('cause I'm the girl who has NEVER been on a sport's team. And proud of it!) so they enrolled me in a ballet class. As it turned out, my heart could not take it. I know this sounds ludicrous, but my ballet class was actually too overwhelming for me. At the time, I had an irrational fear of not being picked up by my parents at the end of...anything. Praise God for healing me of that soon after, but at eleven, I decided that the ideal ballet class was NO longer ideal for me. Change of plans.

A few years later and my love for travel began. At around thirteen, I decided I wanted to go on a service trip to Panama...or was it Peru? Somewhere in South America. I got so excited! I planned out a compelling speech for why Mom and Dad should consider my request, I did my research, I had a friend who was going to go with me...but they said no. No?! I was really not able to see why they weren't ready to send their thirteen-year-old youngest child out of the country yet. Change of plans.

During my Sophomore year of high school, I took seven classes instead of the required six. I did this so that I could continue to pursue my "sport" of show choir. We had an excellent director during Freshman year who had placed me into an advanced group for the next year. I was ready to take on the extra work load and the extra long school days (6:55am-3:00pm!) in order that I could continue my on-stage passions. Much to my dismay, classes were exceedingly difficult, choir was very lonely, and my heart was overwhelmed by the amount of stuff going on in life. I really wanted to switch over to home school. Seriously. But again, my mom who knows me well and loves me much said...let's wait it out. She really is a vessel of God's wisdom, guidance, and love. Thanks, Mom! (Almost) change of plans.

Skip ahead 3 years and find me, a wide-eyed freshman in college (not far from who I still am). At the first sign of the dating game, I was eager to take my turn. When a young man found me, charmed me, and then decided to not pursue me I was...well, as you can imagine, very sad. As it turned out, I was just playing the pre-dating game. Sad is my word. I don't dare go beyond sad when I recollect because sad is all I need to remember. God's goodness has always gotten me through the most difficult of difficulties. Again, change of plans.

And now. If you haven't heard, I'm back in the States...a little earlier than I'd expected. Don't worry, I didn't get kicked out by the government or anything! I believe my story in Turkey is not yet over, but rather needed a pause. My health was not in the best of often I forget that feeling healthy is SO important. Praise God for healing my body since being home! Thank you to those who have prayed for this area because I can skip and hop and eat whatever I want now. Yay! Because of those health concerns and because of a few misunderstandings, it was better that I remove myself from the community of service a little early. How I hate to leave you readers guessing at the details, but I simply have not processed my time in Turkey deeply enough to know how to share specifics. God is faithful to take care of his children and I have seen this over and over again! Change of plans.

Picture: I had lots of great "see you later" moments by the Med before leaving.


Jason Leith said...

Hey. this is a captivating post, Christine. It's good to hear that you are in good health and i am looking forward to catching up with you soon! i hope you heal in mind as you have healed in body.

Tiffany said...

GAH! You are such a good writer. Love this. :D